Anh's Adventures

Theme for 2012- Edit

2012-01-03T14:44:00.001-05:00

The other day I was on amazon looking for headphones. There are so many options. How do you choose? My sister suggested user reviews. But then are thousands of those, who has time? I read a few, then picked one. It probably isn’t the best one, but 10 minutes later, I’m happy to focus on a bluetooth device.

Over the last year, I’ve strengthened my decision-making skills. How? Start with big picture in mind, focus on essentials, and delegate well. As I progress to executive management, I envision more options and less time. I’m developing my “empowering story” to motivate myself in moments of uncertainty. I’m finally admitting to myself that I’m ready for greatness. It is scary, and exciting at the same time.

I’m doing less this year, and focusing on what really matters. I’m learning Spanish, going hiking, and writing more. Before, my space for solitude was driving in the car. Now, I’m taking some commitments and people out of my life to focus on the ones that matter most to me.

Forget Amazon. Next time I’m buying headphones, I’m calling my techie-friends for advice.
What matters most to you?

Can we chat for 5 minutes?

2011-09-20T23:29:00.001-04:00

via @ Bindaas Madhavi

Today I had a series of 5-minute conversations:

The 5-minute call to plan a board meeting
The 5-minute call to pick a time and place for lunch
The 5-minute call to check-in and "see how you're doing"
The 5-minute chat to plan zumba and yoga workout dates
The 5-minute chat to schedule a coffee date

The best part? These 5-minute conversations created 10 hours of quality time with my network.

Do you have 5 minutes?

Gifts and Growth

2011-09-13T09:36:00.002-04:00

via @vinothchandar

It’s my last 2 weeks in DC. This means I have 2 weeks to seemy network, to sell most items, and to ship a few things. Maybe it’s thepressure, but I’ve been extremely productive.

In this period of personal transition, I’ve started 3 newprojects. It’s probably not the wisest thing to do, but I’ve never felt socertain about uncertainty. To envision new pathways, I’ve asked my network togive me feedback. Thanks Lianna @IMPACTSS for sharing with me tools for my continuedgrowth:

Gifts:

Participative leadership: “through our conversations, I know you value participative leadership and collaborative work between your colleagues”
Visionary: “sees and strategically plan long-term (whether for the organization you are at or in your personal life)”
Good listener, great communicator: “you have really strong listening skills, always detail-oriented in the listening aspect”
Coach: “You are a great coach in mentoring people on how to advocate for themselves”
Mindfulness: “I think your greatest asset is that you create a very welcoming space for others to talk to you”

Growth:

Assume positive intention/ giving second chances
Continue to open more doors
Take more risks with established leaders
Focus on less commitments or activities and go for quality time

What are your areas of gift and growth?

Where Are The Wild Things?

2011-09-05T19:07:00.002-04:00

via @ Ahopsi

Mine are mostly documented in journals. Most of the entries are relatively tame. Some entries are too silly to share with others. After spending part of the holiday weekend cleaning out my closet, I started rereading these notes to myself.

In between t-charts, to-do lists, and ticket stubs, I found my former self.

December 16, 2003: I'm making time to exercise, relax, go to concerts
December 21, 2003: Read books that people have given me
February 9, 2004: I'm glad I don't have as many meetings to go to this week
February 15, 2004: I'm currently taking a break and watching the All Stars game
August 8, 2005: Post a paragraph on structure of accountability online at discussion board

I'm letting my former self guide my future self.
Have you listened to yourself lately?

Hurricane Irene Gave Me Quality Time

2011-08-28T18:34:00.000-04:00

It started with dinner with friends Friday night. Some of the busiest people I know came together to share stories, moments of pain, moments of joy. Together, we found ways to navigate life's challenges and opportunities.

Hurricane Irene gave me a rare opportunity to slow down. I was supposed to go to MLK Memorial, supposed to see friends, supposed to stick to a schedule. Nothing happened as planned.

Instead, I found myself letting go, letting moments happen and reacting in the moment. Over the course of 24 hours, I had the pleasure to start and finish a new book, cook several dishes, enjoy conversations, check-ins, coffee. Hurricane Irene gave me quality time.

How do you turn challenges into opportunities?

Don't Put Me in a Box

2011-08-21T10:46:00.000-04:00

via Mllerustad
Yesterday I met a new friend in the restroom. No, I did not talk to her while in the stalls. That is just weird. We happened to have a conversation at the sink. My gift of gab helps me build new relationships, beyond the safe spaces.

For most of my life, communication skills was a weakness. For me, accounting would be a safe space. I am detail-oriented, and accounting would align with my analytical gifts. Five years ago, I became a teacher. I enjoyed developing people, and learning new skills everyday. Today, I wear hats that allow me to bring my positive attitude and strategic thinking skills to different situations.

Over two months of conversations with people in my network, no one gave me any answers. Instead, I received lots of questions to ask myself. People saw so much potential in me, building my confidence and affirming my decisions. I like to move to different boxes, especially ones that don't exist yet.

Today, I'm ~~blogging~~, attending church, visiting museums, picnicking, editing, creating new frames for board matters. Tomorrow will be completely different, and equally dynamic. Don't put yourself in a box.

What makes you uncomfortable?

2011-08-09T09:32:00.000-04:00

via @http://lisaptran.tumblr.com/

Nothing scares me more than the status quo. Don't get me wrong, I love the certainty of wi-fi at Starbucks, the quality of mom's gourmet food, and the punctuality of people in my life (especially since I'm not always on time.)

While going on a walk yesterday, I realized that I am uncomfortable with comfortable. I not only seek out change, I love to create it. While hopping from one cafe to another, I reflected on some key decisions and actions. Why do I do what I do?

After 3 years in the DC area, I'm making the move back to CA, not to go again, but to stay (just like the receipts at Shake Shack.) I'm ready to make a deep commitment to work at the intersection of education, philanthropy, and technology. I can't wait to leverage my strengths as a bridge builder and change agent to create new pathways for people.

What makes you uncomfortable?

What should I do for my birthday month?

2011-06-01T08:42:00.000-04:00

My goal is to create something new everyday this month. First creation- a poem. Got ideas to share?

via North Carolina girlfriend getaway

Kitchen Conversations

(Inspired by a visit to a family I work with from Tanzania)

She looks up with outstreched arms

I lower my stance to be on the same level.

She gives her request in English and Swahili

I respond with a smile.

Her sister starts reading a book

I recognize it's one of my favorites.

She stops me to emphasize a point

I see my name on her map.

Their father recounts his journey

The one that starts back home.

Yet home is no longer Tanzania

I begin to understand.

Secret to happiness: Mother goose and baby chicks

2011-05-15T09:39:00.000-04:00

Last Tuesday, I went on a hike and picnic at Brookside Gardens. This event was held before another evening event. Yikes! How much time do I have? Can I make it to both events? Why did I do this to myself?

Instead, I found myself watching the mother goose and her chicks walk around the park. I had a great conversation with a 5-year-old. For the first time, I pushed a stroller with an 18-month old and she was still ok after our hike. I took my allergy medicine and stopped to breathe, to chat, to laugh.

In conversations with family and friends, I'm learning to let go of my controlling tendencies. Yesterday morning, I found myself choosing among three different events, all important for different reasons. At the end of the day, I showed up for one, and asked for help. With support of my network, I managed to do all three.

Have you asked for help lately? Why? Why not?

What belongs on your square?

2011-05-04T22:23:00.000-04:00

Last Thursday, I was working outside my element, cutting fabric to put together a square, my contribution for the group quilt. Which pieces do I choose? Which ones do I leave out? Why did I choose certain elements?

As I reflect on the past month, I left out blogging. Instead, I started reading again- novels, magazines, nonrequired reading. While loafing, I discovered my new favorite drink, beet/carrot/pear/apple juice. While sauntering, I stumbled into friends I haven't seen in a while, and connected with new friends. While living in the moment, I almost forgot about my to-do list.

As I waver between puttering and being productive, I look forward to blogging my journey. I'm checking-in with my personal board of directors this quarter, starting spring with greater clarity and vision.

What belongs on your square?

You have time to cook?

2011-03-31T21:40:00.002-04:00

via @lisaptran
Over lunch at a Peruvian place this afternoon, my fellow board member asked me how I find time to cook. In between conversation about cheese and travels, I mentioned the resources I have ready at hand.

I work next to a Whole Foods. I subscribe to a farm club, and have fresh produce delivered on my doorstep.I substitute miso when wine is not available for making pasta sauce. My foodie friends and family offer recipes, restaurants, resources. How can I not cook?

For a planner, I don't plan ahead for food. Most of the time, I improvise and play around in the kitchen. Sometimes the dishes are terrible; other times, the dishes are delightful.

What do you prioritize? Why?

Will you step into your spotlight?

2011-03-25T12:48:00.000-04:00

via @lisaptran

Yesterday, I had an hourlong conversation with my brother on his birthday. We talked about our passions, career, opportunities. We reflected on our interests, challenges, pathways. My brother had his plan in place, and ready to step into his spotlight. I've only recently stepped into my spotlight. What took so long? Why?

In conversations with my female friends, I noticed similar patterns. It was painful for me to recognize that I was being hypocritical encouraging board leadership when I was afraid to become board chair myself. I was afraid of the spotlight, my own spotlight.

As March comes to an end, I'm reflecting on the legacies and leadership of women in my life, in community, in organizations. Among these women, we're taking chances, driving change, inspiring others. Oftentimes, these accomplishments are buried and only surface in small group conversations.

Will you step into your own spotlight? I've done it, not terribly safe, but not scary either.

Can hospitals be like home?

2011-03-19T11:34:00.001-04:00

Cupcakes, flowers, or magazines? Sometimes I bring all three items. Because hospitals can almost be like home.

via @lisaptran
I've visited 4 different hospitals in the last few months. One hospital had a beautiful vase donated from China in the hallway. Another hospital had a secret restroom hidden in a different hallway, almost felt like I was in my own zone, on a flight to a different place. Surprisingly, all of the hospitals had chapels.

I remember most vividly the "death" floor. I could smell and sense the critical conditions. I could see the stress on people's faces. I was scared.

Yesterday, my moment of panic revolved around macaroons. Yes, the coffee one. For Lent, I decided to give up drinking coffee. This sacrifice seemed so small relative to moments of pain my loved ones have endured.

When I read about the happenings in Japan, and the crises around the world, I think about the small sacrifices I can make at home. Because places like hospitals can feel like home sometimes.

Why wait?

2011-03-10T21:36:00.000-05:00

via @lisaptran
I don't like doughnuts, but love Doughnut Plant. It's been 2 years since my last visit. Why wait so long?

For this Lenten season, I've decided to cut out coffee, start reading the bible, and do a carbon fast. I'm a coffee addict, and in a few days, have been getting headaches from withdrawal. I've never read the bible, but felt inspired to start on Ash Wednesday, especially since I have a Spanish/English version. Since getting my car shipped from California last March, I rarely walk or take public transportation anymore. I'm starting small, opting to walk or take public transportation at least once a week instead of driving somewhere. (With a road trip planned and trip to LA next month, really need to walk more!)

I'm excited to go back to Doughnut Plant later this month.

What are you putting on hold? Why wait?

Age is just a number

2011-03-06T23:29:00.000-05:00

How old are you? You look young. You're mature for your age.

When I was teaching, I was once mistaken for a middle school student. Yes, I did teach at a middle school, and did not wear the required school uniform. Unless I was asked, I never revealed my age. When my students asked about my age, I told them something along the lines of 85 years old. When asked again, I told them my real age. At that time, I was 22 years old. One student was surprised that I had a "real" job. She shared that her older brother stayed at home, and he was around my age. Another brother was in jail.

In my career so far, I've been blessed to work with people of all ages. I can never forget the stubborn 75-year old who stormed my classroom, or the 12-year old who wrote me a letter to request homework because he was in the hospital with leukemia. I've felt more comfortable sharing experiences and insights with team members 50 years older than me, and yet I sometimes struggle to relate to some of my own peers.

I never really know how to react to statements about my age. At the end of the day, I rather talk about other things. Instead of singling me out, how about recognizing the contributions of people my age, or even younger?

Let's create spaces where it's ok for people to look young, be mature, look old, be immature, and everything in between, at the same time.

Where did my time go?

2011-02-22T23:52:00.000-05:00

via @lisaptran
Two months into the new year, it's time for a time audit. I don't watch television, and don't watch enough movies. I do spend a lot of time online, but don't tweet too much. Where oh where did you go time?

The good news is that I spend a lot of time sleeping and socializing. At least I have those priorities in order. On average, I give about 20 hrs/month to 2 commitments on board of directors. Recently, I volunteered for a different commitment, but this new commitment should not tip me over the scale and cause me to lose significant sleep yet. Thus, I'm saying no to new commitments, would love to help, but not now, and not me.

The bad news is that I spend too little time on myself, at least on my introverted side. I'm even on extroversion-introversion on Myers-Briggs. I don't have these priorities in order. I should give about 20 hrs/month to myself. For friends and family, make sure I do my yoga classes, and practice Spanish, really need this time!

Do you do a time audit? Where do you spend your time? Where should you spend your time?

Dig deeper

2011-02-15T22:23:00.000-05:00

Last weekend, I attended the Teach for America summit in DC. It's amazing how the life lessons I learned from my time in the the classroom translates into my current realities.

One such lesson focused on plants. For my 7th grade students, we talked about the flowers-images we see as success. Rarely do we talk about what happens underneath, so pivotal, so vital for success.

For every blog post, there are three times as many that never make it online. For every positive thought, there are three times as many negative thoughts that never surface. For every action, there are three times as many people (often more) that doubt/prevent/discourage success.

For all my friends and family suffering in stressful moments, there are three times as many people waiting to help. I'm learning to ask and receive help, sharing my most vulnerable moments, my roots, with others.

How do you dig deeper?

Sweet or savory?

2011-02-08T23:31:00.000-05:00

via @lisaptran

I love sweets. Lately, I've been eating lots of greek yogurt w/honey, cherimoya, and Japanese candy. However, in the last week, I've cooked with Mediterranean sea salt many times. Whether I'm in my tiny kitchen or in the church pew, I've been seeing and hearing the same message. Salt is good for you.

Salt adds flavor and zest to any dish. Salt is used to preserve. Salt brings out the best in other ingredients. I'm still sticking to sweets, but experimenting with salt in different ways.

Do you like salt? How do you include or exclude salt in your life?

Where did you get those shoes?

2011-01-27T13:55:00.000-05:00

Leopard-print boots. I knew I could her trust her at first sight. An hour earlier, she had called me to connect and confirm my travel plans. Yes, I'm still going to California.

I've never had a female shuttle driver before, and was excited to hear her story. How did you become a shuttle driver? What time did you wake up? How many females are there? I ask a lot of questions.

She shared with me her dreams, her travels, her children. Her daughter is older than me. Her passion is opening restaurants, combining French and African food. Her travels have taken her to Mongolia, Senegal, Hong Kong, everywhere. (She was once married to a diplomat.)

We swapped stories and shared laughs about the snowstorm. When everyone got stuck, she stayed. She never got stuck, finding ways to park and drive through obstacles. (She lived in Mongolia for 5 years.) When I reached the airport, I gave her a hug, and promised to connect her to some friends from Cameroon. It amazes me how her positive attitude, and great shoes, have taken her to so many places.

For the record, plaid rainboots today, and sandals tonight.

How does your attitude affect those around you?

Funky flow

2011-01-24T00:41:00.000-05:00

How do you move? How do you stay still?

Maybe external factors motivate you to move faster. This weekend, I picked up my walking pace to avoid the cold. Maybe internal factors compel you to stay still. This weekend, I finished my first book of the year, in bed. Maybe it's something you can't yet name.

For all these funky, sticky situations, I wish there were easy answers. In the meantime, surrounding myself with positive people. Because positive people makes it possible for me to flow through the funky.

Stop, drop, and go

2011-01-20T22:42:00.007-05:00

Why am I busy? overwhelmed? stressed?

Striking up conversations with strangers. Sharing hugs with non-huggers. Staying later than planned.

via @lisaptran

I remember these moments vividly. In the spirit of spontaneity, I've experienced deep conversations and deeper relationships. This happened when I felt most busy, most overwhelmed, most stressed. This happiness happened because I dropped the scheduled for the unscheduled.

For people and possibilities, I'm making space for spontaneity, and still keeping some scheduled items.

How do you create space for spontaneity?

Social entrepreneurs can't do it alone

2011-01-16T21:40:00.000-05:00

“Whatever affects one directly, affects all indirectly. I can never be what I ought to be until you are what you ought to be. This is the interrelated structure of reality.” -Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.

via @lisaptran

The best part about being sick is isolation. The worst part is also isolation.

While I willed my body to become better for different reasons- friends to meet, retreat to facilitate, projects to create- I appreciated the silence, and sleep. The past week made me appreciate the people I take for granted: barista surprising me with free lattes, friends tolerating my persistent tardiness, mom calling to show love.

The hardest part is receiving love from others. It still makes me uncomfortable to receive gifts. With time, I've learned to accept the gift, and honor the person giving it. Who am I to deprive the person of giving his or her gifts?

Receiving makes me vulnerable; giving gives me control. To fully embrace the people in my life, I'm receiving more this year. Yes, I will happily drink coffee, will accept Spanish lessons, will accept your offer of help. And, I will ask for help.

Social entrepreneurs can't do it alone.

New Year, No Resolutions

2011-01-03T09:10:00.000-05:00

Why do you do what you do? As I struggled to make sense and sound coherent during a 3am conversation, I cannot think of a single defining moment, rather a series of experiences that generated momentum to make the current me.

This year, I'm moving with momentum, making the most of every moment.

When I woke up at 11am the past two days, I accepted that my body needed it; the body in motion needs rest sometimes too.

via @lisaptran

As I reflect on my personal mission: expand opportunity, challenge mediocrity, be happy, I'm grateful for people and experiences in the past year to help me meet this mission. In 2011, I look forward to new challenges, new people, and new pathways for making my mission more meaningful in scale, scope, and spirit.
I'm ready to embrace diversity in action, in thought, in people.

How are you making the most of 2011?

Will you walk with me?

2010-12-28T07:11:00.005-05:00

A few days ago, my siblings and I visited Palm Springs. In 27 hours, we enjoyed rain, snow, and sunshine. We shared stories, drank hot chocolate, and walked despite the weather. The highlight was the time we spent walking with each other: to slide in snow, to grab coffee in the morning, to play at casinos in the evening.

Today, while stranded in Nashville, I enjoyed a beautiful walk with strangers: to book new flights, to eat at unknown restaurant, to share stories.

Thank you for walking with me this year. At IMPACT Silver Spring, I focused on my areas of gift and growth. I’m still working on being more present, being more expressive. I’ve been better at removing the cellphone from the table, and away from conversations. I’m learning how to text message, to send thoughts when I’m thinking of someone or anything. “Durian, only mom and I are eating them” makes me smile, and reflect on moments of joy for myself, and moments of pain for others.

When can I see this person in person? Why? Why not?

There has been some trying times this year, and I’m grateful for family and friends for letting me lean, showing love, from food to hugs and conversations. From my dayjob to sidejobs and passion projects, I’m grateful for working with amazing people on a daily basis. I’m learning to savor every second I spend with loved ones. I’m grateful for your presence in my life.

Just enjoyed durian for breakfast a few days ago, and can’t wait to see you in person soon to enjoy some time together. (Try the durian, we can always settle for dark chocolate J) Have a blessed, beautiful, and bold new year.

Much love,

Anh

P.S. My gal pal, Sheana, logobarista is designing a logo for my blog. Looking forward to blogging more adventures in the new year.

P.P.S. My sister, Lisa, has a photoblog. Going to shamelessly steal (share) photos from her blog, since I prefer writing, and she does the photos well.

Multitasking

2010-08-12T23:17:00.000-04:00

My brother just returned from South Korea and gave me the gift above: book mark/hair stick/letter opener. I've struggled to receive gifts in the past, and it's never easy to receive anything from anyone.

This gift was easy for me to receive . Unlike the white elephant gifts, this one is relevant, practical (my brother knows me well), and more importantly gives me 3 different experiences every time I use it. These experiences happen to be things I do on an almost daily basis (all offline): read, open mail, put my hair up. The first one happens to be something I love doing everyday. My brother also loves to read too.

What gifts can you give that create experiences? Can the gift spark shared experiences?

Sink or Swim

2010-08-05T23:00:00.000-04:00

via @lisaptran

For me, someone who doesn't swim, the water can be uncomfortable.

Two years ago, I moved cross country on a whim. Last year, I participated in my first coaching experience as part of the Emerging Leaders program with LEAP. Last month, I joined the board of LEAP, and find myself again cross country, on purpose and passion.

In the last week, I've connected with different people about gifts. At work, we're talking about our gifts and growth plans. At church, we're talking about our gifts and talents. At home, I come across Jeff Bezos talking about gifts vs. choices.

In all these moments, I had a network of support, and never felt alone.

What are my gifts? How can I grow? How do I choose?

I'm diving in, and learning fast. Help me swim to shore.

Finding new space

2010-04-11T12:18:00.004-04:00

I used to hate the outdoors. There are memories of itchy legs, sunburns, clogged noses, and watery eyes. There was my asthma inhaler sidekick and frequent trips to the doctor for allergy shots. Morse code did not help me communicate my needs.

A week ago, I moved to a new place, right in the middle of lots of oak trees, and high pollen. I no longer own an inhaler, or need allergy shots, and have been breathing through my nose for over a decade.

Once the barriers were removed, the outdoors became a safe space. For me, it became a new space for exploration, creation, and relaxation. Add some sunscreen and I can spend all day outside.

Sometimes I get discouraged confronting the barriers that make it difficult to create change in the nonprofit world. In these moments, I can’t just stare out my window and look at the trees or listen to the birds. I have to find a way to hike, bike, and run alongside the vibrant life right outside my window.

What barriers prevent you from trying something new? How do you remove the barriers?

P.S. One of my friends recommended this book for creating change: Switch

March Madness

2010-03-01T07:59:00.003-05:00

Via @CR Artist

March is a busy month, some might consider it madness. I am juggling 8 different pieces of my life, 4 personal, 2 work-related, 2 volunteer.

In the nonprofit world, this is not news. In my world, I’m taking stress out of the life wheel.

I am making March a stress-free month. According to my water bottle from lululemon, “stress is related to 99% of all illness.” I’m too young to be sick.

I am making time for cooking, exercising, and sleeping well.

I am writing again.

I am watching basketball.

How do you overcome stress?

Feeding Football

2010-01-11T09:13:00.006-05:00

via @ Piez

I knew Aaron Rodgers played football last night. I knew that the game was great. I didn’t watch one second of the game.

Through twitter, facebook, and googlechat away messages, I was able to “listen” to a play-by-play of the game. Perhaps I was missing out on a great game, but I was perfecting a pot of vegetarian chili. That was my priority.

In an ideal world, I would watch football all day, and still have time to cook and eat well. In my nonprofit world, I’ve seen friends and colleagues not eat, yet find time to finish e-mails and projects.

For me, it takes intention to party with purpose, and perhaps more planning. How about fun, friends, food, (maybe football) together? Beginning this month, my roommate and I will gather our friends together, offline, for Third Thursdays, sharing our passions. We’re kicking off with yoga.

For everyone else, I’m “listening” so keep me posted. I’m relying on you to give me my football feed. Namaste.

New Year, New World

2010-01-03T21:48:00.015-05:00

On Sunday, I rediscovered my world, buried under a stack of books. After bribing myself with a movie, I decided to tackle the item that is always on my to-do list, clean my room.

Every time I want to clean my room, I think of a better investment of time.

Do I need to do this right now?

Most of the time, the answer is no. It’s easy for me to say no, especially to myself. Like many of my friends in the nonprofit world, it’s much easier to say yes, especially with my time, to share and serve someone else.

This year, I’m saying yes to myself more, and learn ways to empower others to say yes to themselves too. I believe it’s possible to lead a balanced and healthy lifestyle while working in nonprofits, serving ourselves and serving others at the same time.

The world is back in order; the globe is now on my desk where it belongs, to battle writer’s block and to bring inspiration. Cleaning my room, and watching Food, Inc. are great investments of my time.

Where are you in your world?

Magical Moments

2009-12-30T22:50:00.012-05:00

(via @lisaptran, she captures magic in motion)

I started this year with a trip to Disneyland. 2009 has been a magical year, a year of transformation.

Through coaching, I learned more about myself and what matters to me, my loved ones, and my community. I became mindful of meetings and made space for magical moments (blogging, twitter, something not scheduled time.) I am still learning to be more in the moment.

Through conflict, I learned to lead, to follow, and finally let go. I became more emotional and empathetic to others. I am still learning how to manage conflicts.

Through change, I learned to grow (new apartment, new jobs, new leadership.) I became more comfortable taking on challenges. I am still learning how to create a culture of change.

In 2010, I am making magic, with my community. I’m looking forward to new blogs (including one for work), new relationships, and new lessons. Let there be learning.

How are you making magic in 2010?

Jumpstart 2010-Don't Be Lucky

2009-12-23T12:02:00.006-05:00

Last weekend, I went on a camping trip with family at Lake Cachuma. I enjoyed sunshine on the West Coast while friends endured the snowstorm on the East Coast.

On Monday, my siblings and I planned to eat at La Super Rica a la Julia Childs, and do some shopping at the outlets. These plans were halted when my car didn’t start in the morning. After several attempts, we realized the battery was almost dead.

Crisis!

The funniest part was when we popped the hood and didn’t know how to close it! We thought about getting crash courses in car maintenance from my dad for the long-term, but had to switch gears immediately. What to do right now?

Yesterday, I thought about nonprofits currently operating in crisis mode. Anything long-term gets shelved. I’ve been getting many end-of-year thank yous and appeals, almost not sure where to donate my money. There are some appeals from organizations at risk of closing.

For sure, my $25 to Cal alumni becomes $100 after matching funds. I know the value of my donation to organizations that I volunteer on the board of directors with, YNPNdc, and beginning in 2010, MVMA. For the rest of the world, don’t just ask for my money. Why should I donate to you? As Bill Traynor writes at Lawrence Community Works, give me your value proposition.

For the car crisis, we asked for help, first calling dad on the cell, then asking our neighbor next camp site over. Our neighbor not only revived my car, but showed us how to jumpstart it, so we can do it ourselves. We were lucky. In the end, we did go on the planned adventures.

Yesterday, my car battery died, and I cancelled plans in LA. Again, I was lucky because my dad happened to be home and replaced the car battery for me.

I don’t want to be lucky. For nonprofits waiting on luck, I wish them good luck. For the rest of us, let’s continue listening to and sharing our stories, demonstrating our value, and building relationships. We will earn luck and funds along the way, especially when we need to ask for help. Jumpstart cables might come in handy too.

What happens when you find yourself in a crisis? How do you build and manage luck?

On Giving

2009-12-13T23:24:00.008-05:00

A few days ago, my roommate and I had an idea. Let’s gather some friends for a merrymaking brunch. For such short notice, this was a big deal. We usually have our calendars planned ahead, with plenty of time for people to make decisions.

Three days (2.5 days?) is plenty of time.

Yesterday, a group of friends gathered and created cards for a local cause, connecting to each other and to strangers.

“In every corner of America and all over the world, intelligence and energy are evenly distributed, but opportunity, investment, and effective organizations aren’t. As a result, billions of people are denied the chance to live their lives to the fullest, and millions die needlessly every year.” Bill Clinton, Giving

This holiday season, I’m finding and creating opportunities to invest in others, to give and receive well.

(I’m giving away my books in 2010. If any of these titles seem enticing, come by my apartment to pick them up, including Giving. For those far away, I found a gift for you: Seth Godin's What Matters Now)

What items are on your wishlist? What are you giving away?

Orange Sheep

2009-12-07T08:25:00.005-05:00

“Be the orange sheep in the family if black is already taken.”

A quick google search proves that orange sheep do exist, not just on the framed artwork from Urban Outfitters. I had to find the orange sheep, on sale in Philadelphia, and bring it home (the artwork.)

I’ve been running into orange sheep lately, online, offline, everywhere. It is a blessing to spend time with other orange sheep, running together. Even better, not all of the orange sheep are in the same room together; I’ve met a few in other spaces, outside nonprofit rooms.

Are you an orange sheep (or purple cow)? How do you survive and shine (beyond the color) in a family of “black” sheep?

In the Red

2009-11-30T07:48:00.004-05:00

Earlier this month, I learned how to play blackjack for the first time. I also never learned how to play chess, and a group of 6-year olds tried to give me a 5-minute lesson last week. I’m still learning.

In the last two months, I’ve been operating in the red.

I had to reach back into my past, be back in Berkeley, and connect with myself from five years ago. I went on a walk with a former supervisor, visited a professor at his house, and started drinking coffee again.

Back in Silver Spring, I attended a retreat and cried upon sharing my story. I don’t cry the first time I meet someone; I rarely cry at all.

While in Pomona for the Emerging Leaders training two weeks ago, I thought about my future. One of the facilitators mentioned that in difficult circumstances, people can choose to accept it, leave it, or change it. I was doing all three, at the same time.

The hardest part was asking for help, and being okay with it. I've struggled with receiving gifts from friends, family, and strangers. It's much easier for me to give gifts. In conversations with my coach, I realized that I was afraid I could not return a gift of the same magnitude to the same person. After some time, I've found that gifts do not have to operate on one-way streets; gifts can be amplified and provide access to new streets when shared with others.

I’m now back in the black, and back on my blog. And the blackjack game? I went all in, and somehow ended up winning.

What keeps you going? How do you stay in the black (emotionally, mentally, physically, spiritually, financially) while working in the nonprofit sector?

Something Not Scheduled

2009-09-26T22:28:00.002-04:00

I rarely take a taxi: expensive, impersonal, crazy. In the last few days, I have taken three taxi rides. I made the exception in Chicago.

Khaled drove me from Midway to Evanston. He shared his story and upbringing in Palestine, and his current gig driving taxis to make some money to go back to school. He is studying architecture, and Chicago was the best place for him. “I had to leave my country because I wanted to go to school.” In between Arabic coffee and California dates, I learned about his journey in the Midwest.

An unnamed taxi driver drove me from Evanston to Chicago. He shared his story and roots in Burma and Berkeley. He was proud of his kids: two doctors, a bioengineer. He was working into retirement, because all of his kids are unemployed. “In the US, an education does not guarantee you a job.”

The third taxi driver drove me from Chicago to Midway. He had been driving taxis for eight years, and it had become routine. He explained his winter routines, and clothes regimen. The secret to Chicago winters: CNN. I know who to call to help me shovel snow, or make the news. “I climbed out of the window and used a chisel and hammer.” When a freight train halts the taxi, I learn about my driver’s hometown in West Africa.

When was the last time you made an exception?

Losing a Loved One

2009-09-15T21:36:00.004-04:00

I have maxed out my cards many times. In fact, I open so many new cards in new places that I’m surprised I have not been banned yet. After all, the library has saved me from a decade of summer school sessions (thank you mom for believing in books), connected me to resources to serve my community, and introduced me to a lifetime of learning. I cannot imagine losing the library.

Now, it is our turn to save the library. Friends, help my former roommate, friend, and Teach for America teacher, Maria Zambrano, liberate libraries in Bridgeport, Connecticut: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=128037912837&ref=nf We definitely do not want what is happening in Philadelphia (http://libwww.freelibrary.org/closing/ via @ajlovesya) to happen anywhere else around the country.

Someday, someone might knock on my door about those late fees. But, today I can and will take action and make a donation because it might be too late if I wait any longer. Will you join me?

20-year plan

2009-08-29T06:15:00.003-04:00

Where do you see yourself in 20 years?

Yesterday, I was asked that question and more. I'm still working on the 10-year plan- a challenge given by my mentor.

Yesterday marked my first conversation with my coach. As part of my leadership training with LEAP, I have 6 hours of coaching. When caught off guard, with no plans in mind, I answered the following:

In 20 years, I want to write, travel, consult, volunteer, and teach. I want a career in the nonprofit sector, and don't think anything would be different from what I'm doing right now. I know that whatever I do, it will have to align with my personal mission statement: expand opportunity, challenge mediocrity,and be happy.

Yesterday, I enjoyed a picnic with old friends. If asked fourteen years earlier, I cannot answer or expect that I will picnic with old friends fourteen years later on a rainy Friday evening in DC.

Yesterday, I made time for fun and recreation. It's an area of my life that I scored lowest on my life wheel. Sometimes, attending a happy hour feels like work because I'm trying to multitask at the same time. Oftentimes, I am talking on the phone but checking e-mail concurrently. I have to refrain myself from doing so much at one time; I can focus and give the other person and myself quality time.

I don't have all the answers. (I was reassured that I do have the answers...I still have 5 hours of coaching left.)

Where do you see yourself in 20 years? Where do you see yourself right now?

In Love, Amoroso

2009-08-19T21:42:00.003-04:00

"Yo soy un buen vecino." That was my pickup line last Monday. I knew that Alma and Delmy would help me move beyond the first knock and engage in conversations with our neighbors in Wheaton. These lovely ladies from Lawrence Community Works shared their passion and experience from Lawerence, MA with neighbors in Wheaton, MD.

Among the three of us, we knocked on 70 doors. We left phone numbers to follow up on future relationships, and wrote down information from friends we promise to call back soon.

My team joined several teams to go door knocking as part of the Neighbors Campaign. This effort is an initiative of Impact Silver Spring to connect neighbors to each other and to resources in the community to weather the economic times.

In times like this, I am humbled to be a part of this holistic campaign. I am walking to new places and running into wonderful relationships. Will you join me?

Holistic Health

2009-08-13T23:18:00.003-04:00

For some, a king-size kit kat bar coupled with an In-N-Out burger might evoke guilty feelings. (I had the pleasure of indulging in these items and more in the last two months.) For me, I don’t feel guilty, at all.

Besides food indulgences, I used to feel guilty about any indulgences on myself. In my teaching days, I would work 7 days a week, never quite finding time to exercise, yet always finding ways to get sick.

Nowadays, I rarely feel guilty about taking care of myself. Here’s how I have approached my holistic health:

1) Take a vacation everyday. During a meeting today, someone asked if anyone had upcoming vacation plans. I remarked, does the dentist count? I was actually serious about this comment. I prioritize dentist visits, and also make time to read and write leisurely, enjoy a few cups of tea while watching the sun rise in the morning, and exercise when the day is most calm. When a real vacation rolls around, I don't need to compensate for anything.

2) I say no to people. There are a million events and happenings all the time; I cannot do everything well. When I say no, I am sincere and if I can, refer the person/organization to the right people/resources. At the end of the day, I cannot please everyone.

3) Reframe entitlements to privileges, and limit them. When I was away last week on a leadership training, I enjoyed watching a few minutes of television each day. I watched the return of Laura Ling and Euna Lee on CNN live. I learned about sharks. Television is better when it is kept to a minimum. Now that I have given up my car, I appreciate driving a lot more, and don’t mind driving to spend time with friends and family.

Do you feel guilty when you indulge on yourself? How you do maintain holistic health?

A Decade of Experience

2009-06-04T22:21:00.003-04:00

I started when I was 15 years old. Now, I’m entering the 10-year anniversary mark. It truly is a cause for celebration. Ten years ago, I started my first job, and earned my first paycheck. This month, I’m starting my tenth paid position (All jobs have been in the public sector; I would have to write another blog entry about my experiences in volunteering and service.)

I’ve been doing some analysis and learned the following:
1) There are difficult people at every age, from pre-K students to baby boomers
2) People like to talk about everything and anything
3) Genuinely listen to people
4) Talk less, but speak up when it counts
5) Remember birthdays and names
6) Ask for help
7) Offer to help
8) Be on time
9) Call when late
10) Keep everyone informed
11) Show gratitude
12) Follow through
13) Be patient
14) Ask questions
15) Ask for feedback
16) Do not assume anything
17) Give people the benefit of the doubt
18) Be personable, but not too personal
19) Be accessible, but set boundaries
20) Every mistake is a learning opportunity

What lessons have you learned from working?

Quarter Life Celebration

2009-06-01T21:10:00.003-04:00

I’m tired of hearing about the quarter life crisis. Yes, I’m turning 25 at the end of this month, and I’m looking forward to it. There are many crises in the world as is; I don’t really need or want another crisis to worry about right now.

I’m turning my quarter life crisis into a yearlong celebration, and I need your help.

Instead of asking for your money, I’m asking for your time.

Teach me a skill this year. When I talked to my sister earlier, she remarked, “I don’t have any skills.” Two seconds later, she offered to teach me how to make digital photo collages. (I can brainstorm with you if you are stuck. Trust me, you have plenty of skills!)

In exchange for your time and service, I will match and return the favor to you or someone else. I can offer the following: review resumes/cover letters, prepare for interviews, lessons in: public speaking, personal mission statement, time management, and Vietnamese language.

I will edit this post accordingly…so far I have the following lessons confirmed:

As of 6/1/09:
· Thuy: digital photo collage
· Thanh: handmade cards
· Huy: swimming lessons
· Diem: everything about Ebay

Join me in this skill swap.

How I Learned About Values in Third Grade

2009-05-27T23:42:00.004-04:00

I was different from most kids in elementary school. For me, the tetherball court was a safety hazard, and the monkey bars was associated with painful bruises on the hands. When kids would run to the lunch line, I would slowly take my time and walk there. And, I loved the spelling bee and panning for fake gold every year-clear expectations and results.

For three years in elementary school, I had the same teacher. I was in a combination class and my teacher, Ms. Saati, moved up with me every year, from 3rd grade to 5th grade. I once read somewhere that children develop the seeds for lifelong values and beliefs around eight or nine years old. I am no exception.

I remember Mrs. Saati as strict and not very personable. She didn’t smile that often either. She was neither fun nor funny; classroom walls were bare and there were no real colors anywhere. To throw her off, I remember finishing assignments quickly, and see if I could anticipate her action. She would calmly challenge me to check for quality work.

I knew she had high expectations for me, and challenged me to confront my weaknesses head-on through lots of reading and writing exercises. Daily oral language and daily oral geography are vivid warm up activities that were not too pleasant at that time.

Mrs. Saati was the one who realized that I did not belong in ESL classes, and discerned that the real reason why I didn't speak up in class was because I was bored, and put me in gifted class. Because I love words and analyzing anything, she aligned my passion with skills and allowed me to succeed at the spelling bee.

I remember when I didn't want to participate in a physical activity and told her "The doctor told me that I can't participate...I have breathing problems." She told me, you mean asthma? That's not a problem.

One time, I remember acquiring a tin box at the class auction. She used tickets to motivate students extrinsically and reward us for good results and behavior. However, she rarely gave out tickets. We had to work really hard. I gave that box to my dad, and he kept it for years.

A teacher can leave a lasting legacy and impact on students. Today, I learned that Professor Takaki passed away. Although I never took a class with him, I was inspired by him. I remember reading Strangers from a Different Shore and giving a copy to my younger brother to supplement his high school education (I think my brother ultimately chose Cal for its ethnic studies program, among other things.) A good teacher is never a stranger, and allows us to see different shores within us.

Has a teacher made an impact on your life?

This I Believe

2009-05-25T23:20:00.002-04:00

I'm intrigued by NPR's stories about people's beliefs and values. This is my version:

About five years ago, one of my supervisors mentioned that there is a unique occurrence when the sun rises. What happens? She mentioned that if you look closely enough, you will be able to see a green dot.

Where is the green dot? How do I find it?

"You will find it."

Because I am a morning person, I have been able to witness many sunrises, but never seen the green dot.

What is wrong with me? There must be no green dot!

On the plane ride home from Seattle last Saturday, I slept for the first time on a red-eye flight. I woke up just in time to witness a beautiful sunrise. I had no idea where I was (geographically, well aware I was ready to get off the plane) or what time zone I was in, but I knew that this time and place was special. For the first time, I saw the green dot, actually many green dots. They kept appearing before my eyes.

Sometimes, green dots appear in the unlikeliest place. It took me five years to see the dots. But, it was well worth the wait and hard work. I believe in green dots.

Have you seen the green dot?

Finding Happiness

2009-05-23T01:11:00.001-04:00

I have a confession. I have been unhappy in the last few months. After some soul searching and many conversations, I’ve finally realized that I can be happy anywhere. The challenges will always be there, but there’s opportunity with every challenge.

I will always be challenged with red-eye flights, but the airport offers opportunities.
Here’s how I am currently finding happiness at the airport:

1) Watch a kid lug a lime green suitcase with wheels that light up
2) Go on an adventure to find the healthiest food
3) Join crowd in amazement as Lebron sinks the game ending 3-pointer
4) Spill lavender oil all over myself, and relish in its therapeutic effects
5) Secretly admire the man lying flat on the ground enjoying a nap, right outside the restroom and wish I could tolerate cold tiles and imitate him

Are you happy? How do you find happiness?

A Framework for Change

2009-05-17T17:32:00.003-04:00

In the last few days, I had the privilege to convene my AmeriCorps Dan Than fellows for a leadership summit. One of our speakers talked about the concept of a framework for change, and that framework can be learned, and not just experienced. She mentioned the importance for young leaders to gain a broad context to push for change, and that young leaders don't necessarily need to "earn your stripes" through experience.

As I reflect on my own framework for change, I realize that I have been trying to gain a broad context by doing the following:

1) Surround myself with people with the experiences
2) Read constantly
3) Put myself in different positions to gain perspective
4) Ask questions
5) Embrace all tasks, from copying papers to making board presentations

Do you have a framework for change? What do you do to gain a broad context?

Board of Directors

2009-05-10T13:13:00.003-04:00

A board member serves a powerful position. Not only does this person shape the vision and strategic direction of an organization, but serves as the spokesperson for the organization. Whether soliciting funds or sharing stories, board members persuade and convince others about their organization's mission. Board members do all of the above, and more, for free.

Over the past week, I had the chance to engage in conversations about a different type of accountability-the personal board of directors. Upon reflection, I realize that I do have a personal board of directors, but I didn't think of them in that way.

Who is on my board of directors? There are some family members, some mentors, some friends, and some colleagues. It is a diverse array of people from different backgrounds, different age groups, and different locations. They allow me to purse my personal mission statement everyday http://anhptran.blogspot.com/2009/02/mission-possible.html.

The chairwoman of my board is my mother. During the phone calls we make to each other, she challenges me and questions me to make sure that I arrive at the correct answers myself. I remember my mother never gave me a curfew in high school. Instead, she would ask me the following morning, how was it? Where did you go? She put the ownership back on me, and I loved the trust she had for me to explore, make mistakes, and be responsible for my actions.

Happy Mother's Day. Do you have a personal board of directors? Who is on your board?

Position of Privilege

2009-04-29T20:31:00.006-04:00

"Put yourself in a position to change the world."-Katie Orenstein

I had the chance to attend the Op-Ed project http://www.theopedproject.org/cms/ facilitated by Katie a few weekends ago. "The OpEd Project is an initiative to expand public debate, with an immediate emphasis on enlarging the pool of women experts who are accessing (and accessible to) our nation's key print and online forums—which are a gateway into public debate, feed all other media, and are a hub of thought leadership." Women are largely underrepresented in these fields.

Katie also spoke about how women being overly humble can be a disservice to everyone else. What if someone can benefit from your opinion, ideas, or experience? Maybe, the social benefits far outweigh the individual benefits. This challenged me in the past few weeks.

I thought about all the wonderful, incredibly humbling people I've met in the nonprofit community. Of course, there are the select few arrogant ones, but overwhelmingly, the nonprofit community is a big, extended family. We share stories, learn from each other, and support each other. I've ran into a few who blog about their experiences, insights, and share their knowledge with everyone. I've learned from the nonprofit resource exchange on Twitter.

I thought about the evolution of my blog, from personal to professional to an amalgam of both worlds. The personal cannot be easily be separated from the professional work. There is no need to separate the two either. That is a priviledged position.

At the end of the day, I believe everyone is an expert at something. Please share your expertise because the world can benefit from you. Do you currently blog? I'm taking my writing to a different level, and my goal is to write an op-ed by this year, in time for my quarter life celebration.

Have you put yourself in a position to change the world?

Why I Volunteer

2009-04-24T21:43:00.002-04:00

In honor of National Volunteer Week, April 18-25, I wanted to share with you two experiences in volunteering and its impact on my life.

Teaching:
I have taught throughout my life, at home to my five younger siblings, during college facilitating environmental justice class and leadership seminars with my peers, and in Los Angeles with Teach for America to 7th grade students.

When I moved to Maryland, I wanted to volunteer and teach Vietnamese language class for second grade students. I started doing that in the fall and loved it, but travel and work conflicted, and couldn't do it consistently.

Recently, I resumed teaching with Junior Achievement. Once a week, I take the bus to a middle school in Silver Spring to teach international trade for 7th grade students.

There is nothing better than waking up at 6am, knowing that I have 4 hours before I work at 10am, to spend it however I want to spend it. I choose to teach. I'm not sure how much I actually contribute to students' well being, but I know I benefit greatly from this experience. A recent discussion on imports and exports spiraled into questions about human rights and the fact that many products in the US were imported from China. The students challenge me, and I love it.

As an added bonus, I make new friends on the bus, enjoy early morning walks, and catch glimpses of nature, from cherry blossoms to beautiful birds.

Writing:
I love editing papers and writing. If I had time at Cal, I would have studied English as a third major. Volunteering for fun, from revising personal statements to press releases, have turned into a paid venture this summer when I'm a writing TA for college students at the University of Maryland.

Whether you are a lifelong volunteer or new to volunteering, here are some steps to guide you:

1. Get Ready: Assess your passion, experience, skills, and time commitment.
2. Set: Make a gameplan. Research organizations. Ask friends. Where can your services be most impactful for yourself and the community?
3. Go: Just do it. Why not?

Do you volunteer? Why do you volunteer?

Letting Go

2009-04-21T23:21:00.006-04:00

It was a Monday night, and I had a difficult encounter with a difficult person. I was bothered because this particular encounter not just affected me, but has the potential to affect other people too. I immediately thought about my actions. What did I do wrong?

My mentor tells me, "Sometimes it's not you, and you cannot control everything, especially a relationship." But, I know a solution for this person's problem. I think I can help. I don't want to see them unhappy. "Anh, what if the person does not want your help? You need to let go. This experience will only make you a stronger person."

For an extremely logical person, I cried (rarely do that). I want to trust this person again.
"You can't volunteer your trust, the other person has to earn it back from you." Indeed, some things you cannot control. "Just focus on what you can control, and do it really well."

I don't quit. When I'm confronted with a challenge, I question my actions, seek support, and work hard to figure out a solution. For the first time, I'm letting go of a person. I think this is the best strategy right now.

This is atypical but I'm talking less and doing less for this person. I'm focusing on myself. I'll let go of any guilt that I'm not doing enough. I hope this experience does make me stronger. I refuse to quit on this person.

In this current economy, nonprofits are making sure that we demonstrate to everyone, especially our funders, that we can do our job well. There is a need to do even more, because everyone expects the nonprofit community to respond in times of crisis. Are we doing too much? Do we have to let go of certain things to be more effective?

Have you let go of something or someone? When is it okay to let go?

Mentorship

2009-04-19T12:03:00.004-04:00

One of my favorite relationships is that between mentor and mentee. My mentors have allowed me to live my mission statement everyday: expand opportunity, challenge mediocrity, and be happy.

Since high school, I've had mentors at every stage of my life. Currently, I have three different mentors. One is local, and allows me to call him at midnight or visit him on weekends to bounce off ideas. Another one is a peer mentor who guides me through my work. Although I'm miles away from California, I have frequent contact with my former supervisor to get advice and support.

My mentors have challenged me to become better, asked me hard questions, offered insightful advice, served as a pillar of support, and listened to me in difficult times. They inspire me to be the best person that I can be, and continuously work hard to become a better person.

In the nonprofit world, staff members are often stretched thin. I know I need all the support I can get, oftentimes from mentors, to stretch safely.

How did I get in touch with my mentors? One by circumstance, one by referral, and one by luck.

Don't be afraid to approach someone who you believe would be a great mentor to you. Most likely, they would be delighted to help you, because mentorship is one of the best relationships. You will be able to enrich the life of your mentor in many ways, even mentoring them without realizing it.

My mentors are among the busiest people I know, and yet they make time for me, all the time. Now I'm off to bonding and spending time with my mentor, working on strategic plans and analyzing LOST.

Do you have a mentor? Can you return the favor and mentor someone else?

Apology Accepted

2009-04-15T22:05:00.003-04:00

I believe in apologies. It solves problems. It allows the other person to save face. Ultimately, I want to attack the problem, not the person.

I've apologized when I've been wrong; it's harder to apologize when you're right. One time I actually wrote down on a piece of paper another person's flawed logic and listed evidence to point out to the other person. I never ended up using the paper, and tossed it out. Who am I to point out someone else's flaws?

Growing up, I used to get in heated arguments with my sister. We were both too stubborn to lose, and would argue to wit's end. At a certain point, I realized that I hated the arguments, and I would "lose" the argument intentionally. I've since become more patient and mature and understand how to avoid arguments and end them on a good note with an apology.

Recently, one of my colleagues mentioned a longstanding conflict between his organization and another organization down the street. One day, he decided to take a walk to the other organization and apologized on behalf of himself and his organization. The staff members at the other organization did not know how to react to him. They were expecting an argument, and got an apology. Since that pivotal day, the organizations have been able to find common ground to work together for their community.

Dale Carnegie's book How to Win Friends and Influence People talks about apologizing as a strategic tool to build relationships. Instead of pointing out the flaws of an argument or flaws in the other person, put your ego aside, take a deep breath and apologize. It's magical how the argument ends. It has worked for me. Try it.

This does mean that you should always apologize for everything. I used to preface things by saying "I'm sorry." It also means that the apology needs to be sincere. Only apologize if you truly mean it; the other person can sense your halfhearted attempts. An apology is a terrible thing to waste.

Do you apologize when you're wrong? More importantly, do you apologize when you're right?

How to Deal with Stress

2009-04-12T23:35:00.004-04:00

On Friday, I found myself in a stressful situation. Right before work, a stranger entered my apartment, uninvited. My roommate had left the apartment door unlocked on her way out, and a man pretending to be a maintenance worker entered my apartment two minutes after that. I had to think on my feet, act quickly, and react appropriately.

Here's how I got myself out of a stressful situation:
1) Think: The man did not wear the appropriate uniform or ID card on him, and he offered me breakfast. Strange indeed. I was stuck in my apartment alone with someone twice my size.

2) Act: I had to get the man outside my apartment quickly. My phone was nearby, and couldn't quite remember all the self-defense moves from friends. Something about bending the pinky finger backwards really hurts.

3) React: He told me he wanted to check out the smoke alarm. I played along with the story and told him that I can take care of that concern later, along with other maintenance requests. I guided him to the door. In that moment, I was calm.

All of this happened in a span of five to ten minutes. After talking to family and friends, I realized that I was lucky.

I talked to my mentor afterwards and he mentioned the following:

"You control your action and reaction. You cannot control someone else’s action and reaction."

This statement made me think about the importance of my reaction, especially its impact on someone else. I think it was my reaction, not action that made the difference.

Have you been in a stressful situation before? How did you deal with it?

Conflict Resolution

2009-04-08T21:57:00.003-04:00

In my leadership training, I was recently introduced to the pinch theory. According to the theory, when something or someone bothers you, most people let it go because it's not really a big problem. However, the pinches eventually hurt and creates problems that could have been prevented at the beginning.

In my personal and professional settings, I am working hard to be proactive about pinches. Whether it be an error on a bill or an offhand comment, I will let the other person or organization know about it. If something bothers me, I will address it immediately, in a tactful manner.

The following usually works:
"I think I made a mistake. I'm not sure if I understand you. Can you clarify for me?"

I believe conflict resolution leads to powerful learning experiences. I also believe conflict prevention builds lasting relationships.

Are you being pinched? Or, are you actually pinching someone else?

Please prevent pinches from becoming problems.

Gratitude

2009-04-05T23:10:00.002-04:00

Maybe it's the city girl in me, but this week I had the chance to explore small towns and relished the opportunity I had to experience blessings on many levels.

I am grateful for:

1. My neighbor on the plane: We instantly bonded over books. I love how she greeted me with a smile and invited an open door for conversation.
2. The ticket agent at the airport: She upgraded my plane ticket and allowed me to reach my destination earlier than planned.
3. The waitress at the hotel: She made an exception for me and opened the kitchen when it was already closed.
4. Experiences in nature: I watched the most beautiful sunset over DC as my plane landed, stargazed with my colleagues on an evening walk, and toured a community garden with lemon trees and ducks.
5. Colleagues: My extended family shared stories, cooked and fed me, ran errands with me, gives me a wakeup call at 3:30am, and genuinely cares about me.
6. Roomie: Checks-in with me via gchat, phone call, and text.
7. Friends and family: They understand my busy schedule and work around it, making time for me, anytime. I was able to catch up with some during the week, and it was a a delight to talk to some tonight and received my sister's sincere thank you card in the mail.
8. Personal time: I have time for myself to write, read, and reflect.
9. Good weather: Sunshine instantly uplifts my mood.
10. Privilege to travel: I am able to learn about new places, gain new experiences, and meet new people.

What are you grateful for?

Fashion Faux Pas

2009-03-31T23:45:00.007-04:00

When my mother heard about my interview on SBTN (Vietnamese cable network) about the program I direct, she said that I need to care about my outfit. "Mom, that was when I caught a red eye flight and came straight from work." She didn't take that as a valid excuse. She noticed my outfit first, and made sure I chose a better outfit for future interviews.

I used to not care about fashion. Now I care about it more because it actually matters. I focus on my posture and gain confidence in my high heels. Bright colors brighten my mood. And, according to my mother, she didn't notice much of anything else in my interview because she couldn't get over my outfit. The outfit was the first line of communication.

Here's how I find time for fashion:

For a busy person, I believe in practical fashion. Makeup in 5 minutes. Accessories pull things together quickly; scarves, belts, shoes, hats, jewelry, and handbags are magical. I color coordinate my closet because it makes it easier for me to find things. I got a straight perm two months ago because I don't have much time to do my hair.

When I buy clothes, it has to fit into my wardrobe, not because it's on sale. I think I'm a disciplined shopper because I usually buy one or two items at a time. Shoes are a different story though (I gave up shoes for Lent.) My mother gave me a Louis Vuitton bag this weekend, and highlighted the importance of quality over quantity.

Working at a nonprofit is great because I have a lot of freedom to explore and mix and match outfits. My colleagues were all impressed that I packed for a week with a small suitcase. When it's 80 degrees in the Gulf Coast, I can't wait to enjoy dresses, skirts, gladiator shoes and open toe stilettos. I'll wait and see my mother's response.

Servant Leaders

2009-03-25T11:09:00.008-04:00

In the past two days, I witnessed my AmeriCorps members in action. I saw 6-year students walk long distances to join their peers, and even stay after 6pm to finish writing journal entries. I had a volunteer talk to me about the need for more afterschool youth programs in his community, and asked for help to make this possible. I sensed the community spirit when I shared a curry lunch with staff and seniors in Oakland. The connections didn't stop there. I saw some seniors excitedly using computers to write e-mails and watch videos on Youtube. The possibilities and needs were real.

The current news about the Serve America Act makes me especially excited about the hearts and minds that share the ideas of servant leadership. Servant leaders are known for their selflessness to their organization, mission, and community. I am asking for your help to sustain service and make a difference today by calling your senators: http://www.nonprofitcongress.org/?q=NCBAalert.

I can't ask for a greater group of members who are directing amazing programs, and put on multiple hats for their organizations. Many of their supervisors have expressed to me that they are developing their members to eventually become the executive director of their organization. I've seen the past participants in my program take on leadership roles and take on lifelong commitments to service through fellowships, graduate school, and other opportunities.

I encourage you to read more about the act and take action to sustain service. In my undergraduate days, I remember that the Cal Corps Public Service Center's tagline "Real Leaders Serve" was embodied in the work of all staff and students. I was an AmeriCorps member for 5 years in two different AmeriCorps programs. It showed me the possibilities and need for servant leaders. Let's make this happen today.

Networking

2009-03-23T03:14:00.003-04:00

In the last two days, I've been able to catch up with my sister in Berkeley. We had late night chats and early morning brunch. We shared coughing attacks and hectic schedules. It was great to unwind and retreat with her. I'm learning a lot from her, especially on networking.

Some networking lessons gleaned from my extrovert sister:
1) Details matter. My sister observes people well and remembers people's names and stories on first contact. I don't have that skill, but learned that I need to write down information on the back of business cards or in my journal. If you can, I suggest you carry a notepad or journal on you at all times...it helps if you're forgetful like me.
2) It's not about you. My sister asks questions and finds a connection to anyone. She mentioned how she learned greetings in different languages to connect to her peers. I'm not learning greetings in different languages, but will ask more questions next time I meet a stranger.
3) Maintain relationships. My sister writes birthday messages on walls for everyone in her facebook contacts, and talks to people constantly. She showed me that subtle things matter, and I don't need to make a huge time commitment to maintain a relationship. Small, frequent contacts are more meaningful.

My mom used to tell everyone that I talk a lot once you find me on the right channel. Most of the time, I would seldom speak up, especially to strangers. I was waiting for the other person to connect to me. I was reactive.

Recently, I read a book that mentioned the importance of moving the needle and I have slowly but surely moved my needle of networking. Now, I'm no longer waiting for the world to change, as John Mayer mentions in his song, but creating channels for conversation. I'm the introvert moving towards extrovert, and confronting my fear head-on.

The No.1 Fear

2009-03-18T21:48:00.008-04:00

"You are a natural. Your personality comes through your speech. You have good projection. You use body language well. You did not rely on your notes. You had good eye contact with the audience."

I thanked her for the affirmation, but I was really looking forward to the constructive criticism. "You can incorporate more pauses in your speech. Work on the timing on the speech."

After two months, I finally made time to write my first speech for Toastmasters. With my busy work and travel schedule, I had to create a deadline for myself to get the first speech underway. I wrote the draft of the speech on Friday night, and didn't look at it again until tonight when I delivered the speech. Maybe next time, I will do a practice run before delivering it...it might help with the timing of the speech.

I was most baffled at the comment, "you are a natural." Public speaking has never been natural for me, but now has become natural. I'm an introvert by nature, and had to work hard on public speaking. I remember taking a class at community college when I was 16 to work on overcoming my fear of public speaking. Years later, I find myself facilitating classes, conducting workshops, teaching, and now directing the overall communications effort at my organization. Needless to say, I'm no longer afraid of public speaking. In fact, I love it.

Below is the text of my first speech, the icebreaker, conveniently titled "My favorite icebreaker."

It started when I was three years old. Before I could even start my lesson, the teacher had to wait for me. No matter what, I had to finish my food and milk. Maslow’s hierarchy of needs: I have to take care of my basic needs before I can learn anything.

Food has been a vital part of building relationships throughout my childhood, education, and working life. It has connected me to my family, friends, and strangers. I cannot think of a better icebreaker than to talk about my favorite icebreaker for meetings: food itself.

I grew up in a household with five siblings. In my family of eight, my mother was and is an amazing cook. Thankfully, it saved us a lot of money and enabled us to share meals and memories. I remembered before facebook, I knew about the happenings and status of every family member over 2 hour dinner conversations. We laughed, make fun of each other, and bonded over 4-course meals. I knew about my dad’s pesky co-worker. I knew about my sister’s annoying projects. My family knew that I take breaks while I’m eating and was known as the slowest eater. There were times when we laughed so hard we couldn’t talk. And school cafeteria food? We just skipped it and ate at home. My mom’s food was just so much better. On the weekends, we would have elaborate soup dishes, bbqs, and anything under the rainbow. Every single person was involved in the process: from grocery shopping to watching the fire and setting the table. That was normal.

When I went to college, I discovered dorm food and fast food. People ate on the run. That was not normal. What I realized soon was that that type of food and eating was normal for most people. Although I didn’t grow up with soda or fast food, most of my friends and peers did. I appreciated my upbringing even more. It was in college that my palette expanded to Mediterranean, sushi, Indian, and basically anything else. My friends introduced me to these new food items and I was willing to explore them all. Thankfully, I never had to rely on instant ramen. I remember calling my mother and having her guide me to make our version of instant ramen: udon soup, which takes 10 minutes, and is much better. Because I didn’t have a car in Berkeley, my mom made sure I had Korean bbq in my freezer at all times and prepared fish sauce concoctions in jars when I visited home during vacations.

Fast forward college, and I find myself living in Los Angeles, the land of good food. Actually, California is heaven for food. There was the great salad place down the street from my apartment. Trader Joe’s carried cheap wine, unlike the ones in Silver Spring, MD that don’t carry any alcohol at all. When I was teaching, one of my favorite teaching memories was our project to summarize the nutrition unit. I had my students bring a family dish and discuss its history and nutritional facts to our class. It was terrifying and satisfying at the same time. I had parents bring pots of posole, plates of enchiladas, Filipino frittatas, the whole gamut. I was very happy that month, just eating and not teaching. And Hollywood? Forget the touristy stuff. My friends and I would go there for Thai food. When I took my students hiking on the weekend, I had them sample mustard plants. They were shocked mustard came from a plant, and not just from the jar from the grocery store.

Then, eight months ago, I moved from LA to DC for my new job. I didn’t complain about the weather. I complained about the food. Where are all the frozen yogurt places? What about the salad places? Good produce and farmers markets? I’m still complaining, but I’ve found ways to be more resourceful.

Luckily, in my new job, I am able to start at 10am. I have time to cook and prepare all my meals. The other day, I was pan frying scallops at 8am. My roommate walked in the kitchen and told me, “you are ambitious.” I thought, I want scallops on my salad for lunch. They don’t have a place like that near my work.

In my current job, I find myself meeting with strangers over meals. The meetings are always more fruitful when there’s good food. And food is a great conversation starter. I was at my chairman’s house a few weeks ago for a dinner. I instantly bonded with some people over favorite foods and received a wonderful recipe for a soup dish from the chairman’s wife.

I just returned from Houston yesterday for work. Actually, this month I find myself in 12 cities and 7 states. The one redeeming factor for the travel is scheduling in time to meet with family and friends in these areas. The best part is the food. I can tolerate the jet lag and baggage check-in as long as I know there’s good tex-mex in Austin and catching up with my friend Kady. I can grow to love Houston as long as there's good coffee and dessert with my friend Melissa. I am looking forward to my Bay Area trip and Gulf Coast trip at the end of the month. There are plans to go to Tomales Bay with my sister for some oysters and enjoying crawfish over dinner with my staff in Biloxi. I still have some frozen fish that Peter, my colleague in Biloxi, brought to DC when he came for our staff retreat last month. Just imagine him carrying these precious fish fillets prepared by his mother in law to share with staff in DC. I had to smile in gratitude.

Did I mention my family is visiting me in two weeks? My mom called me last week and mentioned she has some fresh scallops a friend of hers went fishing for somewhere. She has plans to cook a soup dish and have scallop sashimi with my uncle’s family in Philadelphia. I’m not surprised that my mom is bringing food with her. I can’t wait.

[I ran out of time, and eliminated two paragraphs midway through the speech...I don't think anyone noticed.]

Getting Hired: Interview, Followup

2009-03-17T22:13:00.004-04:00

I just returned from my Houston work trip, and currently catching up on e-mails, both personal and work. The 85 degrees, Texas bbq, and Vietnamese food was a good treat. In between, I squeezed in some time to see an old college friend and a high school friend. We talked about many things, including career progression and happiness. We shared stories and swapped ideas. While the resume can get you in the door, the interview and followup gets you the job. Here are some insights I've learned about interviews and followup:

1) Take the extra step: A phone call or personalized e-mail makes you stand out. My friend Kady mentioned how she really wanted a specific job, and called to tell them and they offered her an interview the next day. She was hired.

2) Compose your 30-second spiel: I was at a training last week and the facilitator mentioned the importance of having a personal pitch. What are your strengths? What can you do? Summarize that in 30 seconds, which is about 60 words.

3) Followup: Nothing demonstrates passion and commitment more than a short and simple e-mail or thank you card.

4) Dress for success: I interviewed a strong candidate last week and couldn't advocate for him because he overdressed? His cologne was so strong that I had a headache. At the same time, you can stand out with a simple accessory. A distinctive ring, necklace, or bracelet works well.

5) Show confidence: One interviewee was so nervous that I could see her shaking the whole time. Even if you are nervous, fake confidence. If comfortable, use your hands and gestures for talking. I recommend Toastmasters to work on public speaking skills.

Of course, the best time to look for a job is when you currently have a job. I was actually offered a job last week on the spot. In this current economy, I thought about how lucky I am to be in this position. I have options, and have a stable job that I love and not leaving anytime soon. This reminded me of Randy Pausch's last lecture on achieving childhood dreams: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo. Anyhow, he mentioned that luck is opportunity meets preparation. I feel incredibly lucky, and this luck was possible because I was prepared when the opportunity came along. Let's spread some luck on St. Patrick's Day.

Walking While Female

2009-03-15T02:24:00.005-04:00

Considering it's 2:30am, I really should pack and go to bed soon for my flight tomorrow morning. Instead, I'm bothered by a series of incidents and conversations within the last week, all revolving around my safety.

I remember my colleagues being concerned with the fact that I walk to and from work. I have a 10 minute walking commute and I happen to live in downtown Silver Spring, which is safe. (After I walked down Drew St in LA, every other neighborhood is much safer.) However, because I'm female, I cannot walk in peace, ever.

Some of my girlfriends carry pepper spray. A few friends have circulated e-mails on self defense. My sister has me on emergency speed dial. One friend shared her story about being attacked in the Metro. I think I should invest in some safety protocol, especially for all the solo traveling I am doing for work this month.

Regardless, I have a right to wear stilletos (which I do often) and not be objectified. Sometimes, especially in the next two weeks, I wished I could switch shoes and not worry about my safety while walking.

Time Management (Part 2)

2009-03-12T20:45:00.005-04:00

When my sister saw me on gchat and my colleague left around 6pm, they were baffled that I was still at the office. When are you going to leave? In an hour. I knew at the beginning of the week that I would stay later on Thursday (today) because I rather do the heavy work today and relax with light work on Friday. I stayed late because I planned on staying late. I don't really tell people this, because I realize that this fact scares people. I left the office at 7pm, as I had predicted at the beginning of the week.

Here's how I manage my time:

1) Prioritize. Is it really urgent? Why is it urgent? I was amazed when I worked with a colleague on her workplan and she said everything is urgent...very few things are actually urgent, but becomes urgent with procrastination.
2) Think about your values/long term. Will that extra meeting make a difference or waste my time?
3) Sacrifice. You can't do everything. I don't watch tv... it's a privilege when I'm on travel. I don't wash dishes (but I use the dishwasher.) I don't make the bed. My desk at work is an organized mess. I don't need to clean it everyday.
4) Plan backwards. Because of my heavy travel schedule this month, I have to strategically plan for everything else with the time I have left. I love google calendar.
5) Non negotiables are not negotiable. My vacations, personal days, doctor/dentist visits are sacred.
6) Invest in yourself first. Sleep well, eat well, give well, live well.
7) Share your schedule. It allows for accountability and saves time.
8) Chunk time. I check e-mail in the morning, night, 10am and 4pm. My blackberry is helpful because I can sort mail and reply accordingly. I also do heavier thinking activities in the morning, and less thinking activities in the late afternoon.
9) Reward yourself. I motivate myself with small incremental rewards (I'll have the green tea mochi ice cream after I finish cleaning my room.) It works.
10) Schedule in fun. I believe in working hard and playing hard.

Thank you for making time to read my blog entry. :)

Getting Hired: Resumes, Cover Letters

2009-03-10T22:46:00.003-04:00

I went through a stack of 50 resumes and cover letters in 30 minutes today. After serving on several interview and selection committees, I wanted to share some tips and lessons learned about resumes and cover letters.

Cover Letter:

1) Spend at least an hour working on the letter...quality matters.

2) Proofread. Use spellcheck. I can't tell you how many people spelled "manager" as "manger." One person had 7 misspelled words in her letter.

3) Make a connection. Get the name of the hiring manager.

4) Do your due diligence, nonprofit lingo equivalent to do your homework. Research organization's mission and core values.

5) Show, don't tell. Show results and don't just tell someone how great you are.

6) Focus on transferable skills. If your work was in a different industry, what skills can you contribute to the new job?

7) Be confident. Don't sound desperate even if you are desperate for a job, and please don't tell the organization that they would be at a loss if they didn't hire you...nobody wants arrogant people.

8) Length matters. Don't submit a cover letter with two sentences or two pages.

9) Font matters. If I can't read it, I can't read it.

10) Demonstrate passion.

Resume:

1) Stick to a page. Submit a CV only when asked.

2) Quantify results. Show a track record of success.

3) Use bullets. No essays or lengthy paragraphs!

4) Use active verbs. "Help" and "support" doesn't help or support anything.

5) Customize for job. I have 5 different resumes.

6) Proofread. Have someone else look it over.

7) Highlight your leadership experiences.

8) Quality over quantity. Don't create a laundry list of activities. Focus on a few good ones.

9) Be specific.

10) Focus on outputs, not inputs.

I have helped friends and family with resumes and cover letters. Feel free to send them my way. I would rather give you constructive criticism now before you encounter no criticism and no job in the future.

So What Do You Do?

2009-03-08T09:02:00.011-04:00

After several inquiries from friends, family, and others about my job, I decided to write an entry about the work that I do. I was asked about my "typical day" and what my work looks like on a daily basis.

I just finished Jim Collins' Good to Great and the Social Sectors, the monograph to Good to Great. Collins highlights the Hedgehodge Concept that consist of three circles: Circle#1-passion, Circle #2-best at, Circle #3-resource engine http://www.jimcollins.com/lab/hedgehog/p2.html My current job as Dan Than project director, allows me to combine all three circles.

Before my current job, I used to teach middle school students. I realized that I was passionate and driven, but I was not the best at teaching middle school students. I think I was a good teacher, but ultimately, I could not deliver the most impact for my organization, students, and myself if I wasn't a great teacher, and all students deserve a great teacher. While serving on the school leadership board and other settings, I recognized that I was better at working with adults. Ultimately, it was a hard decision, but I decided to transition into a job that fits me better.

My current job allows me to live my personal mission statement everyday: expand opportunity, challenge mediocrity, and be happy. Ultimately, the inputs and what I do on a daily basis only matters if it leads to the outputs. I read an article that mentioned one of the ways to work with Gen Y leaders is not to restrict their facebook and gchat during work hours, but to measure the outputs they can actually deliver. Of course, I find disciplined time always works better, and that would have to be another entry- part 2 of time management.

As I pondered this question of what do I do, fighting a migraine on the plane ride from NYC to DC, I realized that people were asking me about my inputs, not my outputs, when it should be the other way around. I also think most people don't overanalyze things as much as I do.

Here's a recap of my past week.
I worked on recruitment for Summer 2009 Dan Than Corps members http://www.navasa.org/ (website revamped in two weeks!) for my program and worked with my boss to hire a new office manager. In this aspect, I work on human resources and finding the best way to develop the resource engine in my organization. In the same week, I am the bad cop at NAVASA. I make sure all writing goes through several drafts, ensure that everyone adheres to our style guide, and give my boss and colleagues papers with red marks all over. I set deadlines and create a sense of urgency to our work. On Monday, I was snowed in and worked from home, answering and writing e-mails, while enjoying a cup of tea. On Tuesday, I facilitated our staff meeting and worked on our conference in May, and website content with web developer. On the same night, I conducted an interview with one of my Dan Than AmeriCorps members with VATV. I think the interview will be broadcasted this weekend on SBTN (Vietnamese cable network.) On Wednesday, I participated in a member conference call on volunteer management with my Dan Than members and had a great conversation with a new executive director at a partner organization. On Thursday, I was on a call with other project directors about the Recovery Act and ended up working on some development goals for my program. I left for NYC Thursday night for the nonprofit career fair at Columbia on Friday.

That laundry list of seemingly isolated events are all connected to my priorities for my work this year. It's an adventure everyday and I love it.

Don't Depend on Me

2009-03-04T20:54:00.006-05:00

Last Friday, I had the chance to attend the first training for Project LEAP (Leaders Emerging Through Ability and Potential) with the Center for Nonprofit Advancement. The training consist of a series of 5 meetings over 5 months. I am excited about this learning opportunity with 24 other leaders throughout the nonprofit sector in DC. Training #1 focused on Leadership and Self-Discovery. The facilitator asked a question that challenged me: What issue are you facing that this series would address?

I first noticed the problem of dependency when I became the automatic go-to person to facilitate all staff meetings. I love facilitating meetings, but I was bothered that everyone else thought I was the only one capable of facilitating the meeting. I was especially bothered when a colleague mentioned that he could never be me. I told him to not compare himself to me, and that I am by no means a great facilitator. I am good at it, but I constantly need to refine my skills, especially eliminating fillers and using my tone and voice more. I have complete confidence that he will do an excellent job facilitating our next staff meeting.

In the personal setting, I noticed that my younger siblings all ask me to edit essays or for advice in general. I enjoy doing this for loved ones, but I am conflicted that all their energy is invested in me. At the end of the day, it's not about me. I'm concerned if something did happen to me, did I actually empower my colleagues and family members to depend on themselves? More importantly, do we equally depend on each other?

Over the next few months, I want to find answers to the following:

How do I empower leaders and not create dependency on me, but instead create interdependency?

Work-Life Balance

2009-03-03T05:44:00.006-05:00

I've been so busy in my work and personal life this past week that I didn't get a chance to blog on Saturday as intended. So really, when my heater decides to not work as planned and when I wake up at 5am, I think yes, extra time! But, when it's 13 degrees outside, I need to follow up with management and make sure I wake up early on my own volition in the future. Regardless, I've always enjoyed the quiet time in the morning to reflect, read, and write.

This past week has been a test on my time management skills. My colleagues all know that I value time a lot. That is why I schedule things in advance, call when I'm running late, and advocate short meetings. Now that I have a 10-minute walking commute to work, I save so much time for other important things. I still can't believe I used to take 2 hours every day to drive to work and back, fighting traffic in LA.

There are certain items that are non negotiable for me. I have to have 2 hours in the morning to read the newspapers, check my e-mail, get ready, eat breakfast, prepare lunch, exercise, and mentally prepare myself for the day ahead. (I've been lagging on the exercise component. Weather needs to cooperate with me!) On the occasions that I do need to work on weekends, I work really hard for one day, and the other day I reward myself. I also let everyone else know about my non negotiables. On Thursday, I had a dentist appointment that I had planned two months ago. I was not going to cancel, and that was a given fact. My colleagues had to work around my schedule, and I did come to work even though I planned on taking the rest of the day off to pack for my move into a new apartment. The other non negotiable is food. I don't eat a lot at one time, but I eat often. My colleagues and family know that when I'm hungry, nothing works. I need to take care of my stomach before my mind functions. Therefore, I make time for preparing and cooking healthy meals and snacks.

When I satisfy my basic needs, I am able to move up Maslow's hierarchy of needs and take care of everything else, resulting in quality time for myself, quality time at work, and quality time with my loved ones.

On a personal note, my sister and I were recently talking about boys and she asked me about this guy I was somewhat dating. "Well, did you call him back?" "No, I was too busy." She hit the issue on the nail when she responded "You were not that interested in him." That was correct. I think I manage time well, and I would have made time for him if the relationship was significant. My mother, married at age 24, was and still is concerned about my dating life when she remarked, "It's okay if you decide not to marry anyone." I just laughed.

Mission Possible

2009-02-25T22:43:00.003-05:00

In the nonprofit world, we are driven by our mission statement. At least, that's the way it's supposed to be...problems arise when organizations lose focus and stray away from their mission. I am especially worried given the current economy how some organizations might chase after money, however scant it is, and lose their mission in the process.

Now, more than ever, I know I need to stick to my personal mission statement. I just finished An Open Heart by The Dalai Lama. Although The Dalai Lama never explicitly mentions mission, he does highlight the importance of values. Whereas an organization's mission statement is a reflection on the organization's values, my personal mission statement is a reflection on my personal values.

I'm happy in my current job because it doesn't feel like a job. I chose my career before I chose my job. My personal mission statement shapes my career. I don't know where I will end up in 5 years, but I know that my mission statement will provide me with the roadmap to get there.

What is your personal mission statement? Are you mission-driven or money-driven?

Events Planning 101

2009-02-21T10:57:00.004-05:00

After hearing feedback from my colleagues, friends, and family about the different events I have coordinated in the past, from small get-togethers to large conferences, I wanted to share some lessons learned for successful event planning.

1) Seek input from everyone. I love the short zoomerang survey or a quick phone call. E-mail is also an option. I used facebook messages, evites, and gchat for personal events to ask about dietary needs or preferences, expectations, etc.

2) Start early. I am planning a trip to Hong Kong, Vietnam, Cambodia, Thailand, and Laos for February 2010. My sisters and I are going to Mexico in June. I am planning a housewarming event in April when I have settled into my new apartment. The list goes on.

3) Maximize budget. I am mindful of the limited budgets I work with whether in my work or personal settings. Not all of my friends are working full-time and have an income like me. Therefore, I seek quality experiences that don't cost too much.

4) Bargain. Besides making dollars stretch, I also bargain. It is always amazing how some negotiating can really make a difference. I have reduced a previously expensive venue to an affordable or even better, free venue.

5) Show gratitude. A handwritten card and a photo to show appreciation is always better than an e-mail.

6) Food is a necessity. It doesn't matter the event. I make sure there are the basic meals, and more importantly, snacks along the way. Why do a boring sandwich when I can have homecooked tomato ginger soup, Maryland blue crab casserole, and blueberry fruit crisp? (My colleagues enjoyed the fact that we stayed at a bed and breakfast for our staff retreat.)

7) Be resourceful. Because I don't enjoy hole punching paper and stuffing folders, I try to limit this activity as much as possible. I've recently started using more soft copies. Google documents and flashdrives make my work so much easier.

8) Delegate. It is always surprising to me how much expertise people have and they don't even know it. I recently had my colleague, who is more a behinds-the-scenes person, facilitate a team building workshop for all staff. She told me afterwards that she appreciated me pushing her, because she would not have stayed up late, putting together a quality workshop.

9) Share information. A simple cc on a e-mail or sharing a google document makes everyone part of the planning process. I recently shared a "meetings spec" on google doc with family members about our trip to DC-NYC-Philly at the end of March. They appreciated the information upfront, so there will be no surprises.

10) Be flexible. Just because I "sleep in" and wake up to see the sunrise on a retreat doesn't mean everyone else will enjoy doing that too. As long as the end result is successful and people had a good fruitful experience, then I don't have to be too worried about the mistakes along the way. Mistakes means learning experience and improvement for next time.

Now I'm off to work :). Yes, I'm going to work on a weekend, and I'll have to blog next time about why I love the work that I do and how it does not feel like work at all.

Personal Mission Statement

2009-02-18T20:33:00.004-05:00

A year ago, I read a book that changed my life: The Lifelong Activist. I realized that I wanted to do the work that I do for a lifetime, and not burn out, ever. A year later, I am updating my blog to merge the personal and professional aspects of my life. Because I turn 25 this year, and according to my mother, I am already 25, I decided to share my personal mission statement with everyone to help me stay on course. Adventures are best when you share them with other people. Here's to another adventure.

Every day, I will strive to expand opportunity, challenge mediocrity, and be happy.